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I feel a little bit like this. (This being my very first car, which spontaneously burst into flames one day on my way home from work.)
I HATE this time of year. I hate it because it is the most beautiful time to live in New England, and yet I spend so much time in a melted puddle of anxiety and fatigue that I can't appreciate it like everyone else can. I hate that I feel so disconnected, even though I know there are people who love my and think of me. I'm sleeping 8-10 hours a night, and I fell asleep for an hour in the library today. All I want to do is go home and sleep, even though I know that on top of my regular course reading and jewelry shows I have three tests and three papers and Salt and Pepper shakers to complete in the next two weeks. I think that all my determination to ignore this problem is going to have to bend, because I'm sick of being so unproductive and listless. I think it's time to go sit on a sofa and have a chat with someone.
Do other people struggle with seasonal depression (because I suspect that's what you'd call this)? Is anyone willing to share their experience, or what has worked for them?
Thursday, October 9, 2008
The Burn Out
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3 comments:
Hmm-m. Things that make you go hmm-m. I just suffer from your ordinary garden variety chronic depression, which generally only varies with hormones. I know somebody who I think had seasonal affective disorder, but doesn't that have to do with a lack of sunlight? It's still pretty sunny these days in New England, isn't it? What do I know. Sorry, I guess thinking out loud on someone else's blog isn't very helpful.
I don't know what you do - but please - if you find something that works for you - write about it! I'm sure you're not the only one.
Feel better ..
Absolutely! My clinical depression now only rears its head as it gets darker in the year. I used to dread Autumn myself because I knew the depression was going to spiral out of control.
The biggest thing that's made a difference in my life has been stress management. Seeing as you probably don't have the option to do less, unless you want to give up school or jewelry making, I suggest taking medication seasonally to help you over the hump. I have a couple of friends who start taking meds at the end of summer so that they've had time to build up by the time it's dark out. When it becomes lighter they stop taking them again. It works for them, it might work for you, talk to your doctor.
Bettejo: I love it when you think out loud in my comments! I'm a terrible commenter, and you are a fabulous one!
Tina: Thanks! My mom read this post and sent me the e-mail for my old doc, so I'm going to get in touch with him.
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