![Soasa [blog]](http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Bwz_omap5qI/TLdl4vakkBI/AAAAAAAAAZw/hKoqM3VEbvU/S1600-R/Soasa+ArtFire+Banner.jpg)
For the record this isn't the sort of thing I generally share with the public.
I made a life altering decision yesterday. It was a long time coming...weeks and months of unhappiness culminating into one final push. I didn't want to do it, but I know that I needed to, that even though it's causing me pain now, in the end it will prevent much more. I hate hurting people, I hate breaking promises, as naive as they may have been. Forever wasn't as real then as it is now. I hate leaving people behind. I don't want him to feel pain, struggle, abandonment. If there was a way to end something without losing anything I would take it. All or nothing is a hard bit to swallow.
I don't know exactly how I'll react to this in the long run. Today I'm scattered, trying to involve myself in projects, books, work, but I can't hold my attention steady for long. You may see a huge burst of activity from me, attempts to immerse myself completely in my work and not think about what I've lost. You may not hear from me for a while. I don't know. We'll see.
Goodbye my one. Here's to memories and dreams of eternity. I truly wish they could have been.
I made a life altering decision yesterday. It was a long time coming...weeks and months of unhappiness culminating into one final push. I didn't want to do it, but I know that I needed to, that even though it's causing me pain now, in the end it will prevent much more. I hate hurting people, I hate breaking promises, as naive as they may have been. Forever wasn't as real then as it is now. I hate leaving people behind. I don't want him to feel pain, struggle, abandonment. If there was a way to end something without losing anything I would take it. All or nothing is a hard bit to swallow.
I don't know exactly how I'll react to this in the long run. Today I'm scattered, trying to involve myself in projects, books, work, but I can't hold my attention steady for long. You may see a huge burst of activity from me, attempts to immerse myself completely in my work and not think about what I've lost. You may not hear from me for a while. I don't know. We'll see.
Goodbye my one. Here's to memories and dreams of eternity. I truly wish they could have been.
1 comment:
Sorry Robin Marie. Been through break ups, divorce, break ups again, it is never ever easy, no matter what. Hang in - if there is a positive - it's that you always learn something. If I could tell you all I've learned ... well - some of the pain was even worth it to get the education. Sure doesn't feel like it though - not while it's happening. Take care ~
BetteJo
Post a Comment